I like sexy.

i just want to chill with my guy. nothing more. :D i’ll share him with the world, but he is mine. 

even john belushi and dan aykroyd

went to martha’s vineyard. Belushi had a house there. 

don’t believe me? look it up. it’s true. 

men are the most stubborn people on earth.  

ok, i totally want to hang on the set of saturday night live, and than totally go shopping at bergdorf goodman.  

go to the farmers markets, hang in the kitchen and cook for people, have a guest house and whoever can stay. totally comedians  or screen writers. 

it would be all really great. :D

i’ll take on bad vibes if we get somewhere. if your just acting out. get the fuck out!!! 

i’ll take on bad vibes if we get somewhere. if your just acting out. get the fuck out!!! 

(Source: werewolfjesus, via gettingsenpaitonoticeyou)

i know the exact moment i woke up from my shitty zombie life. it was at the movie theatre, i was reading a magazine. and this blonde guy who was working usher, kept bugging me and the bitter sad hardened cynical guy.
just kept coming over, wanting to play some game. 
and he was laughing and so into it. 
i remember i looked up from this magazine. 
and thought, what the fuck is this? i like it. 
i do not remember the exact first time i met him. i just remember  when someone left, i was concerned he could not hide behind “loud mouth fake asshole” anymore. and than that jerk left. and the blonde guy was fucking cool. 
that blonde was a fucking bad ass, because he was himself. 
you just know talent when you see it. and it shines like a bright star. (its so true)
he was better even better!!!!!  he was just fine. 

“for the love of god, dear Quentin Tarantino, get me the fuck out of here. PLEASE.”

—   nvr

a open letter

stay away from me, if your some dude who is a total asshole. please spare me, fake, shallow being nice or thoughtful, or interested.  after yesterday. i’m done. if one more guy takes there “unhappy” life bullshit out on me. no more. the nicer i am to certain guys, the meaner they are to me. i’m fucking sick of it. fuck off. i really mean fuck off. 

i talk to people, because i want too. if i’m talking to you, it’s because i see something, pretty fucking cool in you.  i’m not fake and shallow, i’m not using you in any way. i’m not out for myself. i’m not self-absorbed. 

 do not project your bullshit on to me. 

there are a few people out there, that want nothing to do with me. what i see in them. they could make it. they have got the talent to make it!!!

and their being dumb right now. 

i saw park city, utah, at sundance. i want them there. i want them to see what i saw. it’s fucking fantastic!!!!!!!

i want to go to cannes. i want to stay at chateau marmot on the sunset strip. i want to hang at 30 rock. and where ever they want to go, i hope i’m invited. i love to see people happy and laugh and feel good about themselves. 

i want them to be with their equals and shine super bright. not dumb themselves down to the “group think” of their present situation. 

i can help you.  but you have to trust me. 

wake up. 


Booked my flight home. Vegas baby to La back home to NY

i’ll go. sweet trip. 


Booked my flight home. Vegas baby to La back home to NY

i’ll go. sweet trip. 

all i want to do is go to ani a parody.

i can’t get one person to go with me.  i even sent a message on youtube. 

i got nothing. 


one sad horrific thing after another.

this guy who used to smile at me at the grocery store. the look on his face, when i used to say hi to him. he thought i was so sexy.

he seemed really sweet. he emailed me a couple times. he had a serious girlfriend, i didn’t want to date i just loved his attention. 

anyways he gave the cold shoulder about 2 months ago, i sent emails with no reply. so that was that. 

i just saw him, he told me he’s moving. he was super cold, acted like he didn’t give a shit. “he was out of here”. i stood there, and all i could say was, you seemed unhappy. bye. 

i cried all the way home. i’m crying now. 

everyone leaves i care about. the pain i feel inside of sadness is very unbearable. 

i just stand there, in shock, i’m not even a warm person anymore. 

i’m just cold. 

this is the end of this, there is nothing more i can do.

ok, so. i’m sorry. i’m really sorry i called every friday, and left some depressing, i miss you message. why would you trust me anyways. 

what can i do for you? well, i’m not an actor and i can never be on your set. like you said on the phone that one night. 

your always invited to mine. you don’t even need an invite, your just welcome there. because your you. and i super dig your artistic eye.

i didn’t go to your school,  i’m not a comedian.

 i’m an artist, i just look and focus on tons of different things. and i have a super attention to details. 

i give up. 

enjoy the alien portrait.